How to Get Your 4 Year Old to go to Bed on Time (part 1)

How do you get your child to go to bed by 8 PM so that you can have some quiet time to yourself? 

I've been asking this question for some time now.  My four year old daughter was very compliant in observing the bedtime routine that we had established with her older brother three years ago.  Every day she knew that bedtime would come, and she'd be washed up by Mommy or Daddy, she'd be changed into a nice pair of pyjamas and then tucked nicely into bed after a bedtime story.  And after a kiss and "I love you", the words "goodnight" would sound just as the lights were turned off.

Beginning Stages of Rebelling Against Bedtime

I think it started this past school year.  She just said "I don't want to wash up." But her father, being the adult, would just wash her up and tuck her into bed, and she'd fall asleep almost right away.  Increasingly, it has become more and more challenging. 

Actually, it started with "I don't want to brush my teeth."  Somehow I would think of some fun way of getting her to do it.  It was a lot of work, but a lot better than physically manipulating her to do so against her will. 

Back in April 2012:

Back in April:  tucking her toys to bed...

 

...while Brother was already sleeping

Trying to playfully to get her to sleep - she looks wide awake

Tonight

Tonight, she refused.  I put toothpaste on her brush, and her brush on her rinsing cup.  She's a big girl, and she can wash herself up.  I'm going to respect her choice of not wanting to brush up tonight.  Then, "I'm not tired!  I don't want to go to sleep."  I replied "then you can think," as I ushered her into bed.  Immediately, I was retorted with "I don't want to think!"  It was up to her, but I tucked her in, kissed her and turned the lights off.

I read and breastfed for about 20 minutes before going out of my room to go to the bathroom.  Her light was on, and when I looked in, she was underneath her little table with her thumb in her mouth.  She smiled at me, her eyes sparkling.  It was clear that she did not wish to go to bed.  So I thought to myself, well, I didn't hear her at all when I was breastfeeding... So I allowed her to stay in her room with her light on as long as she was quiet.

Back into my room I went, and I read for another twenty minutes or so before I interrupted by her playful entry into my room.  She had on some knit slippers on her hands and a big smile on her face.  I ushered her back into her room (careful not to let her see the dark chocolate I was indulging on).  Again, I returned to my room to read.

The last time she came in to my room, I walked her back to her bed, tucked her in and turned off the lights.  Wow!  This bedtime "ordeal" finally ended after 10:30 PM... our original routine was getting them in bed by 8 PM!

Please, if you have suggestions, I would love to know what they are for getting my daughter to bed, brushing up willingly.  She starts school on Tuesday, and I would really like to start off with a well-rested little girl.  Please share something in the comments.  Thank you.

Happy Long Labour Day Weekend!